December 2010

No Christmas this year.  You and Emmerson weren't here, so there wasn't a reason to buy gifts.  I saw so many things I thought you would like.  I did buy the Spiderman book for you.  It's customized with you name in the story.  Do you remember it?  Emmerson got a touch book with animals.  You always loved yours so very much and I bet you will be able to read it to her just like Grandma used to read it to you.  We would sit on the floor in your room.  You would be in your footie pajamas, holding the blanket Grandma bought you and sitting in Grandma's lap.  I always let you pick two books, but you would bring back three and ask me to read each one twice.  Then I would lay you in your bed and we would sing "Wheels on the Bus" or "Goodnight Mommy" and name everyone in the family - even Charlie the dog!  I love you Taylor.  I love you Emmerson.  Grandma wishes she had been able to read your books too.

November 2010

Mike tells me everyone is in France.  You have decided to be there for a long time.  I don't send anything any more, since you can't get them.  It doesn't mean I don't love you.  And I will figure out a way to let you know someday.

August 2010

I've sent you a card, or email, or picture every week.  Did you get any of them?  Emmerson got her birthday presents in March, and Taylor - you got all your Spiderman presents in July.  That's your favorite now according to Mike.  I know he comes and sees you all the time.  I got videos and pictures from him when you were learning to play tennis.  You are so cute, hanging your head when you miss the ball.  But it didn't take you long at all to start hitting it over the net.  You are such a smart little boy.  I wish I knew more about Emmerson, but I have hardly seen her.  She doesn't know who I am.  You must tell her.  Tell her how much I love you both and will always feel the same way.

June 2010

Emmerson, I saw you today.  Daddy was taking you to Bright Start Daycare and I called your name.  You turned around in your stroller.  Daddy kept walking as if he didn't see me, but I know he did.  After my appointment I stood outside the daycare and watched you eat lunch.  They showed me you could walk now.  You didn't know the face outside the window, but I knew you.  You look so much like Mommy.  Taylor wasn't there, and I don't think he goes anymore.  I love you Taylor and Emmerson.  I will keep trying but I think it will be a log time.  I hope you will see this and know that I never forgot you.

April 2010

Grandma has tried everything to make sure Mommy knows how much she loves her and you and Emmerson.  But she doesn't believe me and has asked that I not see you any more.  I will still send you cards and pictures and letters every week but I don't know if you will get them.  I love you Taylor.  I love you Emmerson.  I think about you all the time and will never forget you.

February 2010

I'm sorry I haven't seen you for so long.  Mommy and Daddy won't let Grandma come over any more.  Mommy is mad at Grandma because she doesn't think I was a good Mommy to her.  No matter what you are ever told I promise you I did the very best I could and tried very hard to be a very good Mommy all the time.  I loved her more than anything, just like I love you and Emmerson.  I will send you video emails and cards and pictures every week until I can see you again.

January 2010

Grandma finally got to give you your Christmas gifts.  You were gone for over three weeks over Christmas and New Years so they are a little late.  You liked the sand and water.  You really like to swim and aren't afraid of the water any more.  Grandma got you Star Wars figures and a Star Wars ship.  You watch the movies - the old 1970's ones - and recognized all the characters.